One of the upsides of Facebook, is the memory aspect, I see things I've long forgotten. My eldest, close to a decade ago, was filling in proverbs for homework and she wrote "Let sleeping dogs dream" It may not be traditional, but I'm going to stick with that - more optimism and grander plans.
There is so much going on at our age, everyone is busy and juggling their own problems. This can be consuming and cloud our thinking. It can make us forgetful. It makes us see short term, not long term. I know for me, I can rarely think beyond the logistics for the next few days, not weeks ahead like used to. I can safely say I'm also probably more guilty of what I'm about to discuss than I realise.
Yesterday, a friend, at a lunch I had organised with her, was complaining to me about another friend who always overlooked her and never invited her out, that she was always doing the inviting. I had to bite my tongue, as the behaviour she was criticising was the exact same thing she does to me. All the time. I understood she was hurt but I know this other woman doesn't have a mean bone in her body and would be devastated that she'd upset her friend. I couldn't understand that the one complaining couldn't see it from her friend's shoes. When she does it to me, I always just presume she didn't think about it,or the dinner was organised on the spur of the moment, or she presumes we're busy or whatever. If I waited for our offers of hospitality to be reciprocated, I'd probably never see anyone. Ever. I know she has no ill intent, so I don't take it personally, and let sleeping dogs lie.
Better yet, I wish her happiness, so I'd rather let the sleeping dogs dream.
Do you keep score on the invites? Do you try to keep the intent in mind over the action? Will you too let sleeping dogs dream?
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